The Art of The Inside Pocket


Kieran Hoskinson, Writer

If you’re standing up, then I’m gonna need you to sit down because this time I’m getting right into it. Go ahead and take a look inside your jacket. See anything there? If the answer is yes, then you are now my best friend (whether you want to be or not). If not, then I have some news for you; you’re missing out, big time. Throughout history, many gifts like avocados, goldfish, gas stations, and the Fred Meyer Sushi Section can only be described as being given to us from the heavens, and today ill introduce you to another one. For those gazing at the mysterious hole on the inside of your jacket, fear not for it’s not a mistake. That, my friend, is an inside pocket.

This design choice, or shall I say the fated choice, is the perfect way to store your phone, wallet, keys, and whatever else you can think of (as long as it fits). Want proof, look at the image next to the article, see that guy? I can tell you with one hundred percent accuracy that he has reached the pinnacle of life and happiness. I’ll say it once, and yes I will say it again. If your jacket is void, incomplete without the inside pocket, then you, my soon-to-be friend, should invest in the inside pocket.

Now that the formal stuff is out of the way, I believe it’s time to give you what I know you have so desperately been waiting for. Here is it is, my patented, very cared about, and highly sought after opinion graded on a something out of ten scale. Let’s start with the overall design of this pocket. The sleek and discreet design of the inside pocket is enough to already want me to give it  10/10, but for your sake, I’ll hold back and give it three points. The next aspect of the inside pocket I will rate it’s ability to store items. I won’t lie, the inside pocket is an everyday property of my outfit, and as such, I can tell you that using it to store your phone and earbuds is the perfect way to make use of it, so, I’ll add three more points. Now you may be thinking, what more is there to review? You already rated its design and ability to hold everyday items, so it’s a 6/10 right? Wrong. This my reader is where you must use your third eye, see past the mere words on this website, and catch sight of my hints dropped inside the text of this paragraph. I stated that I would give it a 10/10, and also said that the inside pocket is a part of my everyday outfit. Have you figured it out yet? That’s right. This whole review would always end with only one possible outcome. The path I led you down only had one destination, every choice you made, every word, every time you checked your jacket. You were in my web the whole time, caught in the fantasy of my creation. It was all a part of my destiny, that is now yours. All the choices you made were just an illusion, something you could never escape, you only continued to get more and more tangled in the string weaving the world I made you view. Only one path, only one vision, only one review, only one final score. The real reality will be revealed, and your mind opened to the truth. My final score for the inside pocket is…….10/10. Why you might ask? Simple. Because I, my dear reader, am extremely biased.